If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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