Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
