And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Randomize
