i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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