Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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