maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
