when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
