Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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