I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I wish i was in the wii world.
love makes seman taste better
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
