Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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