dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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