if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
