I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
