PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
