Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Randomize
