is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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