he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
