just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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