So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
