hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
