remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Randomize
