I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
