i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Randomize
