The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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