Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize