Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
