home. puking in laundry basket.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize