Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize