I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize