ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
