new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Randomize
