I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize