Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
