Is it normal to miss your booty call?
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
