I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
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