Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
