You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
