I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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