Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
We need to rekindle our bromance
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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