I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
