i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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