But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize