O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
