what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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