Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
