Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
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