i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Randomize
