i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Randomize
