just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
