When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
